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does your home have any of the following:
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Cyprian
Posted - 06 July 2018 09:44
(oh, look, a list)

Score your home for the following:

A word in large letters as "art" (1 point)
Add an extra point for (i) if that word is booze or love related (2 extra points if gin related); (ii) the lettering is upholstered. You can ignore kids names on door to their room.

Do you have any Union Jack/flag pillows/cushions (1 point each)
Add an extra point for each pillow that is washed out colours, 2 points if sepia/b&w

Do you have any "art" from Not on the High Street dot com (1 point)

Are your kids' rooms decorated to look like a magazine interpretation of a kid's room, rather than a jumbled mess of half-built lego and various "inventions" using string, masking tape and egg-boxes (2 points per twee room).

Do you have any vintage travel posters (1 point)

Do you have any internal walls painted grey (1 point each)

Do you have any shabbychic / reclaimed furniture (1 point each)

Do you have a wine chiller fridge (2 points) or an actual climate controlled cellar (5 points)

Do you have any furniture that you refer to as "mid century" (1 point each)

Do you have "metro tiles" anywhere (1 point per room)

Do you have plantation shutters (1 point per room)

Do you have bifold/or other sliding doors for an opening (fnar) larger than 2.5m (ouch) (1 point each)

Do you have grey or white floorboards anywhere (2 points per room)

Do you have Crittal glazing anywhere (10 points)


Misshoolie
Posted - 06 July 2018 09:57
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All of my furniture is reclaimed and/or shabby because I am poor

*wins thread*
Bloody Nora
Posted - 06 July 2018 09:57
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A word in large letters as "art" (1 point)
Add an extra point for (i) if that word is booze or love related (2 extra points if gin related); (ii) the lettering is upholstered. You can ignore kids names on door to their room.

Guilty. 2 points. In my defence, it was a gift.

Do you have any Union Jack/flag pillows/cushions (1 point each)
Add an extra point for each pillow that is washed out colours, 2 points if sepia/b&w

Do you have any "art" from Not on the High Street dot com (1 point)

Are your kids' rooms decorated to look like a magazine interpretation of a kid's room, rather than a jumbled mess of half-built lego and various "inventions" using string, masking tape and egg-boxes (2 points per twee room).

Do you have any vintage travel posters (1 point)

No but I like them. *blushes*

Do you have any internal walls painted grey (1 point each)

Do you have any shabbychic / reclaimed furniture (1 point each)

Do you have a wine chiller fridge (2 points) or an actual climate controlled cellar (5 points)

No, but we have a special booze drawer.

Do you have any furniture that you refer to as "mid century" (1 point each)

Do you have "metro tiles" anywhere (1 point per room)

Do you have plantation shutters (1 point per room)

Do you have bifold/or other sliding doors for an opening (fnar) larger than 2.5m (ouch) (1 point each)

Do you have grey or white floorboards anywhere (2 points per room)

Do you have Crittal glazing anywhere (10 points)

I don't even know what some of these things are, tbh.

How many points is that? Just two?
January Sails
Posted - 06 July 2018 09:57
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A big fat zero for me.
January Sails
Posted - 06 July 2018 09:59
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Crittal windows are 1920's metal framed windows. I've had two arguments with conservation officers who want me to put them in the barn even though they can't explain to me why a 17th century barn should have 1920's industrial style windows.
Used Psychology
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:00
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Metro tiles and vintage travel posters for me Cyp.
Used Psychology
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:02
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Have you offered to put in 17th century windows Sailers?
Cyprian
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:05
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3 rooms painted grey - 3 points
vintage travel - 1 point
metro tiles - 1 point


5 points - I'm the biggest twat so far.
Cyprian
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:06
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they're not bad, Laz. Just an indication of extreme middle-class professionalisticism.
Misshoolie
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:12
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My specific transgressions here are

1 x faded Union Jack cushion (in sons bedroom)
1 x twee child's bedroom (daughters, sons is now a near teenage pit)
1 x mid century sideboard
1 x retro travel poster (of clifton suspension bridge)
2 x "antique" Chinese cupboards
1 x antique Indian glazed door bookcase
Used Psychology
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:15
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Dux will be along to claim 200+ points then.

Cyprian
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:06
they're not bad, Laz. Just an indication of extreme middle-class professionalisticism.
January Sails
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:15
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UP I've proposed simple oak frames in keeping with the couple of existing windows that were put into it years ago and the general oak framed theme.
Cyprian
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:18
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Dux fancies himself as proper old school bow-tie, so will only score by accident.

Metro are smallish (about 6-9cm long) rectangular white tiles, like on the Paris metro.


I expect Abbs wills score highly on furniture...
Cyprian
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:19
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actually probably more 10-15cm...
Tricksy Woo
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:20
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1 point for an old French kitchen table that had it's legs sawn in half to make our current coffee table. I think that one goes in the shabby chic/reclaimed furniture category.

Our house in NL has four sets of huge sliding doors but they're original to the house. Does that still count?
Cyprian
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:25
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There's no escaping. I'm stuck with an extra point for a grey room because I had a tin left over from the study and the kitchen need painting and I CBA going to Homebase&Q
Judy_Carter
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:32
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word in large letters as "art" (1 point)
Add an extra point for (i) if that word is booze or love related (2 extra points if gin related); (ii) the lettering is upholstered. You can ignore kids names on door to their room.

NO TO ALL

Do you have any Union Jack/flag pillows/cushions (1 point each)
Add an extra point for each pillow that is washed out colours, 2 points if sepia/b&w

NO TO ALL

Do you have any "art" from Not on the High Street dot com (1 point)

NO

Are your kids' rooms decorated to look like a magazine interpretation of a kid's room, rather than a jumbled mess of half-built lego and various "inventions" using string, masking tape and egg-boxes (2 points per twee room)

NO AND N/A.

Do you have any vintage travel posters (1 point)

NO

Do you have any internal walls painted grey (1 point each)

NO

Do you have any shabbychic / reclaimed furniture (1 point each)

NO

Do you have a wine chiller fridge (2 points) or an actual climate controlled cellar (5 points)

NO

Do you have any furniture that you refer to as "mid century" (1 point each)

NO

Do you have "metro tiles" anywhere (1 point per room)

NO

Do you have plantation shutters (1 point per room)

NO

Do you have bifold/or other sliding doors for an opening (fnar) larger than 2.5m (ouch) (1 point each)

NO TO ALL

Do you have grey or white floorboards anywhere (2 points per room)

NO TO ALL

Do you have Crittal glazing anywhere (10 points)

NO I HAVE RATHER RACKETTY SASH WINDOWS
3-ducks
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:35
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Vintage travel posters - most definitely, several. And in my office too.

The rest - nope.

Chambers
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:35
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I have a six foot high replica of the Cape Hatteras lighthouse in my living room, acquired on travels.
I don't feel like dancewang
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:39
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Are plantation shutters what I would describe as shutters? I have never described anything as mid century to my knowledge. Does it mean about the same age as OGR?
Misshoolie
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:43
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Fonders f&b shades of grey paint score +25 points
Groot
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:44
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Fonders
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:32 Report as offensive Report Offensive
Technical question, is F&B Elephant’s Breath classed as grey?



Wot fonders sed

if so, 13 points, if not 1 point (shutters)
Coracle Lolling
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:46
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You're gone full Mutters. Bring back the BREXIT! character.
Groot
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:49
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hoolie is that per wall or just per use in home?

If per wall, that gets me to 301 points

\ /
Chambers
Posted - 06 July 2018 10:56
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Oh, and shutters, original wooden floor boards, working open fireplaces, high ceilings, white walls with some framed ink and pencil drawings by my daughter, and quite a few Lego creations by me.
GwenllianJones
Posted - 06 July 2018 11:03
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No to everything.

I do however have a tea towel from the Bodleian on my kitchen wall, depicting shelves of vintage schoolgirls' stories. Does that count?
Tangent Boy
Posted - 06 July 2018 11:04
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Zero for me. Although we do have a Union Jack bath mat in washed out pink and blue which may count for half a point.

Groot
Posted - 06 July 2018 11:08
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I think this one might be coming home for me too
.....Meh
Posted - 06 July 2018 11:08
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I also score zero.

I debated whether my blue whale paint was kind of grey but I think it's slightly more blue.
Lydia
Posted - 06 July 2018 11:10
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I don't think I have any. I don't know what some of them are.
My sister has Crittal windows which were in her house when she bought it. I don't actually like them that much.

Buzz.
Posted - 06 July 2018 11:12
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Plantation shutters in two rooms

Wine chiller fridge, no, but I'm claiming 3 points for the **** off Climadiff wine storage cabinet.
Keef_
Posted - 06 July 2018 11:44
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I have wine fridges and bifold doors so a massive 3 points for me. Does this mean i’m irredeemably naff?
pumpkin
Posted - 06 July 2018 12:27
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I have none of the above and Laz, it’s worse than that: I live in Surbiton.
GHF
Posted - 06 July 2018 12:37
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I have none of the above, but I am about to paint my walls grey and I would like white shutters in the sitting room and the dining room. Does that count?
Buzz.
Posted - 06 July 2018 12:41
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Nowt wrong with Surbiton pumpo. Unless the wind's coming from the direction of Berrylands.
Gabriel Oak
Posted - 06 July 2018 12:49
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no one has yet defined precisely what a high score on this means but this sort of interior furnishing (I need to google the glass thing) reminds me typically of the sort of homes depicted in police crime dramas /decidedly lower middle but aspirational and neat; but then some things are decidedly more OK I would have thought....clearly I need guidance here

A word in large letters as "art" (1 point) NO
Add an extra point for (i) if that word is booze or love related (2 extra points if gin related); (ii) the lettering is upholstered. You can ignore kids names on door to their room.

Do you have any Union Jack/flag pillows/cushions (1 point each) NO
Add an extra point for each pillow that is washed out colours, 2 points if sepia/b&w

Do you have any "art" from Not on the High Street dot com (1 point) NO

Are your kids' rooms decorated to look like a magazine interpretation of a kid's room, rather than a jumbled mess of half-built lego and various "inventions" using string, masking tape and egg-boxes (2 points per twee room).MAYBE-one has this wallpaper and all matching high bed, sofa and desk underneath and so forth with more seaside themed art and lighthouses https://cdn.wallpaperdirect.com/shared-assets/images/products/087647orig.jpg IT IS HOWEVER USUALLY A MESS OF LEGO AND COLLECTED AND STUFF ON FLOOR

Do you have any vintage travel posters (1 point) NO

Do you have any internal walls painted grey (1 point each) YES-Is this bad?

Do you have any shabbychic / reclaimed furniture (1 point each) NO

Do you have a wine chiller fridge (2 points) or an actual climate controlled cellar (5 points) NO

Do you have any furniture that you refer to as "mid century" (1 point each) NO-yuck-grew up with quite enough of that thanks SAYING THAT AT ONE HOUSE I DO HAVE MY MOTHER'S ROSE WOOD DANISH COFFEE TABLE FROM ABOUT 1960 AND A WOODEN COCKTAIN CABINET WITH FORMICA INTERIOR WHICH IS RATHER LOVELY BUT I DIDNT BUY THEM

Do you have "metro tiles" anywhere (1 point per room) had to google that-NO YUCK ALWAYS REMIND ME OF MORGUES/MORTUARIES

Do you have plantation shutters (1 point per room)-NO BUT I WOULDNT SAY NO

Do you have bifold/or other sliding doors for an opening (fnar) larger than 2.5m (ouch) (1 point each)-YES

Do you have grey or white floorboards anywhere (2 points per room)-NO

Do you have Crittal glazing anywhere (10 points) NO-QUITE NICE THOUGH ARENT THEY
Gabriel Oak
Posted - 06 July 2018 12:50
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We had farrow and b done in one room and it's proved a nighmare...poor coverage and hard to wipe marks off.
blindtom
Posted - 06 July 2018 12:53
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Err just the one point for me and my vintage travel poster.
Abbeywell/NSA
Posted - 06 July 2018 12:58
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Cyp in answer to your question I have none of what is listed
Phoebe Caulfield
Posted - 06 July 2018 13:07
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one point for me

My hallway is painted grey
Incakenito
Posted - 06 July 2018 13:15
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Yep I have most of the above but not any worded art which is horrible. Also I’d like a wine thing but my kitchen is too sh*t.

Also elephants breath fonders, *titter*
Cyprian
Posted - 06 July 2018 13:16
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A hallway for solicitors

This is my hallway. It is grey.
rogermellie
Posted - 06 July 2018 13:20
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our hallway is elephants breath F&B
Betty
Posted - 06 July 2018 14:42
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Kitchen has metro tiles and our entire interior except bathrooms is a pale stone/grey colour.... so colour me extreme middle-class professional.