Staff in DLA Piper's Sydney office have been instructed to "beg" partners for work, a dismayed lawyer has claimed.

According to an inside source, a corporate partner told staff that the firm was instituting a new "begging initiative", which required all corporate lawyers to "walk from partner to partner to beg for work". But they would only have 20 seconds to pitch to him, and if they didn't start generating fees they would be put "on notice".

  Please sir, can I bill some more?
 

Apparently the only people exempt from the "new begging initiative" are the secretaries, "but only because they threatened to walk out of the firm" after the office tea (Liptons) was replaced with an "even cheaper, shittier brand of tea called Lanchoo". The source also claimed that DLA has stopped decorating the office lobby with flowers, which have in the past been auctioned to staff on a Friday. And people say miners had it tough in the 80s.

A spokeswoman for DLA told RollOnFriday the grievances, "may have been lost in translation across the Indian Ocean". Responding to beggate, she said, "it was when recently encouraged to ask questions of partners in person rather than by email that a junior lawyer asked how best to approach busy partners. The suggestion (useful for any business environment) was to frame a query with context and timeframe e.g. 'Can you spare 30 seconds I have two questions'. The advice has nothing to do with seeking or 'pitching' for work, it was about encouraging personal interaction rather than emailing someone sitting nearby".

Addressing petalgate, she said the office is not a market florist the flower sale was a one-off to fundraise for staff embarking on a charity trek in support of Indigenous Community Volunteers. As for brewgate, "unfortunately the wrong brand of tea was delivered by the supplier, but staff will soon be sipping Liptons again". If not, time to rev up the protest wagon. And at least they weren't banned from saying thank you. 
Tip Off ROF

Comments

Anonymous 02 September 16 15:22

They used to auction the flowers off! How bloody tight fisted can you get. Do you have to enter an auction to use the bog, with the unfortunates having to sit and piss themselves at their desks. Only one sheet if you need a wipe - its got two sides you know.

Anonymous 05 September 16 15:57

How is auctioning off flower displays for charity tight fisted? No-one needs to bid if they don't want to, someone gets some nice blooms to take home and some funds go to a good cause. Problem with that is.....?