As big family gatherings were scrapped over the Yuletide season, readers took on the RollOnFriday Xmas quiz instead of the customary squabble over Trivial Pursuit.
Despite over 1,000 entries, only 30 readers got all the answers correct. Who said that lawyers pride themselves on attention to detail? Ofqual's algorithm may be required next year to boost scores in some postcodes.
The names of those who got full marks were mailed to a polling station teller in Pennsylvania, who picked out a lucky winner, while observed like a hawk by poll watchers.
And that randomly selected winner is...(drumroll) Joanne Naylor, a senior associate at Eversheds Sutherland.
Commiserations to everyone else.
"Whaddya mean I only got five? I demand a recount"
"I am far more excited than I should be after two unusually intense days back at work after the Christmas break, so thanks for being the best thing that has happened this week!" said Naylor.
With the choice of £100 or lunch with the RollOnFriday team, the Eversheds Sutherland lawyer opted for the cash, given the prospect of lunching with the RoF team uncertainty of when a date could be fixed.
Here are the correct answers to the fiendish quiz.
January: What term appeared in a lawyer's sex slave contract with his submissive client?
The dominant lawyer "may restrain, beat, whip or physically punish the submissive" client.
The submissive client must refer to the dominant lawyer as 'Mr Grey'.
The dominant lawyer must "ensure that no permanent marks are left" on the client's body.
All of the above.
February: What pictures did Mayer Brown share on twitter to promote 'diversity month'?
A female associate and a male associate riding on a tandem bike.
A male trainee dancing with Diversity band member Ashley Banjo.
A male partner posing with a bag of vegetables after shopping.
A female partner abseiling down a building.
March: What did DAC Beachcroft warn its staff not to steal from the firm?
Champagne from the client entertainment rooms.
Bog roll from the toilets.
Bikes from the communal storage basement.
Cookies from the meeting rooms.
April: What appeared on Simmons & Simmons instagram account?
An employee's daughter dancing to Wiley's song Heatwave.
An employee's son doing an impression of Boris Johnson.
An employee's dog paddling after a ball in the river.
An employee's boyfriend posing by a Ferrari.
May: What song did DLA Piper lawyers sing in a video tribute to an outgoing partner?
"The best" by Tina Turner.
"We'll meet again" by Vera Lynn.
"So long, Farewell" from the Sound of Music.
"Good-bye-ee" from Oh! What a Lovely War.
June: Which one of these are lyrics from the CMS choir song?
"We're CMS, we'll see it through, working together, with a tune for you..."
"When we draft, when we meet, when we train, when we bill, we are one..."
"In Real Estate or Energy, we build a team with synergy..."
"Oh Cannon Place, Oh Cannon Place, We'll reconvene, face to face..."
July: What group Zoom activity did Irwin Mitchell invite staff to partake in?
A cookery lesson to make sourdough bread.
A class to teach Twerking.
A music class using pots and pans.
A life drawing class.
August: The Managing Partner of HWL Ebsworth took a newspaper to the Human Rights Commission for joking about his name. What is it?
Juan Martinez.
Bud Light.
Dick Pound.
Harry Baals.
September: In a message to staff about dress code, divorce lawyer Ayesha Vardags said this:
"I firmly believe that with the right footwear, one can rule the world."
"Whoever said orange was the new pink was seriously disturbed."
"Look like a pro, not a pretty young thing."
"When in doubt, wear red."
October: Litigation boutique Joseph Jage Aaronson offered a job as a dog walker for what salary?
£20,000.
£25,000.
£30,000.
£35,000.
November: What did a mural outside Jones Day's office say?
Jones Day: we shall overcomb Trump.
Jones Day: tell Trump he's fired.
Jones Day: hate ain't great.
Jones Day: hands off our ballots.
December: Why did the Chairman of Axiom Stone Solicitors get banned from a village shop during lockdown?
He refused to wear a face mask.
He reacted to an elderly customer who was coughing and spluttering in the shop.
He got in a heated argument with the owner for not selling vegan sausage rolls.
He didn't use the hand sanitiser at the door.
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Irwin Mitchell. Always the bottom of a barrell which has contained fish rotting for months. Mediocre management, poor pay and fecking twerking.
Any they wonder why we struggle to get anyone to take us seriously (apart from people who watch daytime TV in their underpants with a bowl of Doritos for breakfast wondering about whether there's a payday out of the time they tripped over the shoelaces they are too fat to do up).