^{"Fiiiniished!"}

---

The Crown Prosecution Service has demonstrated its keen eye for detail with a vacancy which tells candidates not to apply.

The CPS's 'Dumpy Advert' tempted applicants with a legal services position paying a minimum salary of £48k, then cruelly ordered them to go away.

---

---

A source wondered if the beleaguered organisation in charge of upholding justice in the UK was "trying a new tactic". A CPS spokesperson said, “This was a dummy - not dumpy - advert which was published by mistake. Sorry!”

Its effort, which cannot be blamed on Keir Starmer, follows Clyde's perfect vacancy typo and Shoosmiths' contribution to the genre, which comprised several paragraphs stating, "blah blah blah blah".*

Elsewhere, a Canadian firm has posted the "worst job posting I've ever seen", according to one lawyer.

The ad opens, "Did you enjoy the films Wizard of Lies, the Laundromat, Boiler Room, Layer Caker, Molly's Game?" and then invites candidates to become a litigator at Morganti & Co.

The suggestion that new joiners will get to take instructions from clients who resemble the gangsters, hustlers, and drug dealers from films like Layer Cake is a tantalising one, which one lawyer translated as an offer of, "Do you want to work with a bunch of abominable douchebags?"

---

^{"It's just like the movies I love...yey?"}

---

_{*Shoosmiths post-publication correspondence with RollOnFriday is a precious and beautiful thing which we'll print if Putin's nukes start flying.}