For some light relief after the intricacies on the ECJ's views in in-house privilege, The Source brings you - entirely non-exclusively - the two most exciting cases of the week.
First up, news from Steeton, West Yorkshire. An otherwise sleepy village, The Source imagines, where everyone knows each other and the birds sing all day. However, there is trouble brewing in this bucolic paradise. For one citizen, Leslie Howard, is suing Bradford Council following the approval of plans to build houses overlooking his garden. He's already put up a big fence and seems to have a particular aversion to being seen pottering in his shed.
Does Leslie, 70, fear divulging the secret of his enormous marrows? The location of the bodies under his patio? No. He gardens in the nude, and is suing the council to protect his human rights. "I think it's disgusting", he says. Indeed it is, Leslie.
In the second somewhat troubling case of the week, two men have ended up in court having been rumbled allegedly making sperm available on the internet (normally, of course, the internet makes sperm 'available').
Running their business from a basement in Reading, the pair - Ricky Gage and Nigel Woodforth - offered a "life-changing opportunity" to their female customers. Records retrieved following undercover police work showed that the pair had made 792 deliveries of sperm (presumably it wasn't all their own) to customers, giving them an estimated profit of £250,000. This kind of activity - introducing broody women to fecund men - is, funnily enough, rather more strictly regulated than Gage and Woodforth might have liked, and they are on the hook for the foul-sounding offence of "procuring sperm".
Their clients were allowed their pick from the donors - chosing from ethnicity, height, hair colour. And hobbies. The Source can guess that every donor had at least one particular hobby in common.
First up, news from Steeton, West Yorkshire. An otherwise sleepy village, The Source imagines, where everyone knows each other and the birds sing all day. However, there is trouble brewing in this bucolic paradise. For one citizen, Leslie Howard, is suing Bradford Council following the approval of plans to build houses overlooking his garden. He's already put up a big fence and seems to have a particular aversion to being seen pottering in his shed.
Does Leslie, 70, fear divulging the secret of his enormous marrows? The location of the bodies under his patio? No. He gardens in the nude, and is suing the council to protect his human rights. "I think it's disgusting", he says. Indeed it is, Leslie.
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Some nude gardeners yesterday |
In the second somewhat troubling case of the week, two men have ended up in court having been rumbled allegedly making sperm available on the internet (normally, of course, the internet makes sperm 'available').
Running their business from a basement in Reading, the pair - Ricky Gage and Nigel Woodforth - offered a "life-changing opportunity" to their female customers. Records retrieved following undercover police work showed that the pair had made 792 deliveries of sperm (presumably it wasn't all their own) to customers, giving them an estimated profit of £250,000. This kind of activity - introducing broody women to fecund men - is, funnily enough, rather more strictly regulated than Gage and Woodforth might have liked, and they are on the hook for the foul-sounding offence of "procuring sperm".
Their clients were allowed their pick from the donors - chosing from ethnicity, height, hair colour. And hobbies. The Source can guess that every donor had at least one particular hobby in common.
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