smithers

"They should make an action figure of YOU, sir."


Knights, the listed law firm with the rollercoaster share price, had an all-hands conference in Birmingham last Friday where the emphasis was firmly on FUN.

fun

A commendable decision, as focussing on tanking investments would have been a massive downer. And anyway, these firm-wide knees-ups are supposed to be optimistic, giving bosses the chance to strut their stuff on stage and wow the troops with their best Steve Jobs impression. As such, they serve as a great catalyst for buttkissing, exemplified by the perfect specimen which was birthed onto LinkedIn this week already tugging its forelock, courtesy of a lackey in the Knights marketing team:

"I've been to a few conferences in my time - and listened to a number of business leaders too. But - NEVER have I been to a conference that was on the same brilliant level as our conference on Friday", frothed the grateful witness.

Such was his excitement at being in the same vast conference centre as his loaded chief exec, he could barely get his words out: "And I've yet meet [sic] someone with a vision or as brilliant a business leader as David Beech. Knights - the team, we have a vision, we have a superb culture and I am beyond pleased to be a part of it! Well done for a brilliant day! Looking forward to us all achieving the growth that was mentioned. Looking forward to playing my part and helping support my colleagues in anyway I can!"

A source said- sorry, one second.

bleugh

A source said, "Beech sold his shares to investors at 3.80. Those shares are now 1.23. I’m sure the investors who bought them don’t consider him a brilliant business leader. The ROF golden turd award suggests it’s a shit culture. But in the Knights cult you gotta Toady baby."

What absolute tosh. Knights' share price is rebounding as we speak, I'll have that cynic know:

knight share

It's called a convention bounce, baby, and with acquisitions like Coffin Mew lined up, there's plenty more where that came from. As ever, ROF's unregulated advice for which we have no liability is: strong buy

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Comments

CS 16 June 22 08:02

Looking forward to playing my part and helping support my colleagues in anyway I can

Thumbs up if you know the type. 

Anon worker 16 June 22 17:32

The rendition of ‘Angels’ reminded me of a recent programme on TV where a cult’s praising the ‘prophet’ hid the true agenda - wonder how many families here have been broken or left in the lay-by listening and following this ethos! Integrity, trust and loyalty are values that I have seen employees lose in this firm. 

The Dark Knight 17 June 22 14:37

Now now, ROF, it was an excellent event. Bon Jovi’s hit of “it’s my life” is on repeat. 
 

Has anyone watched the series ‘The Following’ starring Kevin Bacon and James Purefoy?

 

Anon worker 18 June 22 18:34

Great series - charismatic leader, but he and his followers hid some secrets. Those who did not follow their vision were deemed not worthy! 
 

Conference ‘singing’ appears to have been deleted from Knight’s Twitter. That’s a shame ROF, as everyone enjoys a good sing-a-long 

Knights Stokie 19 June 22 13:15

Wasn’t there at the conference, so somewhat disappointed to see the Twitter feed of ‘Angels’ has ‘vanished’ before I had a chance to see it! 
 

Why? Surely not worried that Robbie won’t approve! Or, perhaps, a couple of higher ranked employees are not as angelic as one might be professing and their halos need a spit and polish? Who knows! It would have added more entertainment to this feed though! 

Knight Rider 21 June 22 00:13

https://www.rollonfriday.com/news-content/exclusive-coffin-mew-took-ps1million-covid-grant-boss-enjoyed-record-pay
 

@Interested Party - can’t wait! 

Life’s a 22 June 22 07:47

I hadn’t seen the Coffin Mew article - what a pleasant surprise! I’m now more certain than ever that they fit with our culture (we did a bit of our own streamlining and salary reduction fyi ;)).

Cannot wait to have them onboard. 
 

Now to practice my singing…. I mean swing… and through it all, she offers me protection…. 
 

 

Reminds me of a navy phrase used to describe events which were all “ cake and ar*e”( ie feed the peasants cake and watch whilst they try and crawl up the Sénior ranks ar*rs………….
 

Coffin Mew culture will align nicely!!!

Buy, buy, buy, bye, bye 24 June 22 09:11

Dave - I’m going to give you toadys a bonus.

Toadys - hooray, your the best leader we’ve ever had or will ever have.  
 

Dave - but you all have to buy shares with your bonus.  I will buy mine first, lucky Kate will buy some too and you will all need to buy after us at a much higher price.

Toadys - Hooray, you go first and buy a million quids worth and we will then buy ours for loads more after you’ve spiked the price. 

3 weeks later

Toadys - hooray, we’ve lost up to 40% already but you, our inspirational leader, are only down 20%.  You are truly a brilliant businessman. We and the investors are lucky to have you.

Dave - [email protected]@@.  Buying high street firms doesn’t get the price up, me, lucky Kate and the Toadys buying shares doesn’t get the price up.  They are on to us…….

Tipster Dipster 24 June 22 09:17

I bought a load of shares on RoF’s “strong buy” recommendation.  The shares have tanked by 20% and I’m nursing heavy losses.

I’m going to sue. 

Convention bounce? 24 June 22 09:51

Dead cat bounce.  The shares are today less than a tube of toothpaste in Poundland.

This is despite Knights Glorious Leader, Lucky Kate and various Toadys all buying loads of shares a few weeks ago.

Maybe next year’s conference could open with Chris Rea’s “Road to Hell”.  For investors who were stupid enough to spunk their clients money at around £4.00 a share, it certainly feels that way.

Check your investment portfolios and have a word if your fund managers have walked you into this stinker.  

 

Not Warren Buffet 24 June 22 10:19

Interesting analysis of Knights share price woes by an investor on LSE.  
 

No Opinion

RE: The only way is up?14 Jun 2022 21:18

It maybe something to do with the major shareholder and directors of the company selling huge shareholdings shortly before dumping out horrible RNSs, and then blaming Covid for poor performance when every other law firm worth their salt was having record profits throughout the same period. Maybe. Re the leadership “buying in” - a token gesture and sop to the market? Maybe. Look how many shares they dumped beforehand. What they’ve bought back is a fraction. I do not see that as an indicator of confidence in the business - but that’s just me.

Anonymous 25 June 22 17:31

Might struggle with growth judging by the number of CVs doing the rounds.

So many of their acquisitions seem to have ended up as total disasters.  
 

The share price reflects the legal market’s view of its culture and sustainability.

Avoid! 

Anonymous 25 June 22 20:32

The share price is 94p.  The float price was much more than that.  What the hell is going on? 

They must have spent 50 million buying up firms.  

Merger on 28 June 22 07:31

Wow, last time I looked at Knights share price it was 3 times higher than DWF’s share price.  It’s now lower than DWF’s deflated 94p. 
Could there be a Knowles/Beech alliance on the cards or would that just be two drowning men grabbing a hold of each other?  

Merger my arse 29 June 22 17:07

DWF merging with Knights isn’t going to happen, is it?  Harrods won’t merge with the butcher’s shop up the road for the same reasons.  
 

Hubris 30 June 22 06:49

It’s a share price which reflects greed, stupidity, arrogance and hubris.  Blaming the staff and Covid for the fall in profits was disgraceful.  The profit warning came as a result of the arrogance of one man and one man alone.  He has cost the investors and share holding employees a lot of money.  Trying to undo the damage he has done will prove to be impossible.  

Ha 30 June 22 20:14

Yes it’s now 86p.  The investors got suckered in. Everybody in the law knew what it was.

Fur coat no knickers.  Just like those behind it.