Shave it all off?

I think it must be industry standard actually.

Getting on for 10 years now whichever barber I go to they always cut it unbelievably short on the very top of my head.

Shocking really.

Heh - is it taking you longer & longer to wash your face m7? 

Yes - how did you know? 

I had assumed that my hands were just getting smaller.

I have this problem - fvcker keeps leaving a massive centre parting all the way over my head

I assume you nodded politely when he indicated how much he was going to cut off?  I always put my glasses back on for that moment.

I just take my chances. I have too much pride to come across as vain enough to want to put my glasses back on to see whether they should stop.

(I guess I am very vain in my ostensible lack of vanity.)

This is where women excel. They bring in pictures and provide vivid descriptions what they want. I just say “tidy it up”

heh.. I suffer the same thing, glasses off for the cut, glasses on for the reveal...

you can certainly try suing but I venture to say, it will be costly and by the time it sees a court, you'll have had several haircuts.

get a hat.

I've been getting the same haircut since April 6th 1990.  

Blade 2 back and sides, trim the top until it's almost spiky, no fringe and hide the natural parting..

Indeed - I just mumble unhelpfully, as I do not wish to be thought fussy.  So the end result is always something of a surprise.

When the barber’s cologne is a little enduring

I look like Friar Tuck....

Say a little prayer...?

"Something for the weekend sir?"

Just make it part of your request, I always do...

"1 back and sides, enough off the top so it doesn't show my bald spot. Thanks ."

Would Sir like some product?

Er no, Sir wouldn’t. Sir is not a teenager.